6 effective ways to annoy an ex-girlfriend

Yes, we are all humanists, altruists, noble, generous, ungodly and just good people. Usually. But for this, rules are needed to make exceptions from them from time to time. And sometimes the exes become such an exception – former girls, whom, contrary to the advice of psychologists and wise friends, I want not to be left alone, but, on the contrary, to annoy and nerve. Especially – if there is anything.
Below you will find a list of what usually infuriates girls in the behavior of ex-boyfriends. She definitely won’t like it:

Alternative history

The former are allowed from time to time to strike into lyrical memories. So tell, for example, to your general friends or in social networks how everything really happened. It is not necessary to tag it, and so everything will be clear. The main thing is that your version of what is happening radically differs from the official version and how the ex remembered everything. She is convinced that the trip to Paris was the most striking and romantic episode in your history? Well, nothing prevents you from imagining everything as if your companion had been drinking solidly for 10 days, flirting even with cashiers in Disneyland and leaning on foie gras, so when I arrived I couldn’t fit into half the outfits I bought. By the way, it was then that you began to guess that she was interested not so much in you as in your credit card. Believe me, she will read all this and die from horror and frustration. But the charm of the situation is that the past cannot be changed, and everyone has the right to a personal version of what is happening.

Biased focus of attention

One of the most annoying strategies for the behavior of the ex-boyfriend is when for obvious reasons he falls out of the life of the ex, but at the same time does not go out of the life of her friends and relatives. No one has the right to forbid you to leave witty comments on the photo of her best friend in a bikini, advise her older sister on finance and write “Olga Petrovna, your charlotte is the best thing that happened in my life!” under the culinary posts of the ex-almost-mother-in-law. The ex-gelfrand will probably perceive your behavior as a treacherous assault on her territory and / or an attempt to drag someone from her immediate environment into bed. Yes, and let it go! You are just a responsive and sociable guy, and she is an evil jealous neurotic. Not that her mother is the sweetest lady who, at 50, looks a maximum of 37.

Chance meeting

There is no law that requires you to stay away from “your” places after breaking up. She knows that. But I’m sure that you will be pulled there by sentimental impulses and a desire to nostalgia. No matter how! Falling into a cafe where you had dates, going to her favorite clubs, etc. it is possible and necessary cheerful, noisy, preferably – not a purely male company. The main thing is to pretend that your random meeting did not make any impression on you. A nod of your head as a greeting will be enough. And don’t even think about squinting at the former one – let her burn the back of your head with a fierce look and consider how many bottles of Donperinion you ordered for your friends and – especially – your friends.

Your personal life

It’s not for me to tell you how infuriates when an ex arranges his personal life in record time. But in principle, women suspect that the men they abandoned will not lie with their faces swollen from tears in the pillow, but, on the contrary, will go into all serious ways. From grief and hopelessness, of course. So the photos on the Instagram of other slender bare legs hugging your neck, of course, will not please her. But they won’t make a splash either. It’s even worse if a couple of months after the breakup it turns out that you are again “in a serious relationship” or even engaged, and you are planning a wedding * at the end of April. It will be especially difficult to endure if your relationship, in the ex’s opinion, prohibitively stalled at the stage of “we are just meeting”.

*Of course, starting a family in spite of the former is not the wisest decision. But if everything goes by itself that way, the effect will be overwhelming.

Positive change in you

Surely, while you met, the girl in you did not triple something. Or maybe even a lot of things. And she, as she could, pushed you to positive changes (get a haircut, lose weight, stop behaving like a fucking scammer, watch less telly and travel more, etc.). And you, accordingly, resisted and rested, like a cat who is dragged to a castration session. Well, if there is a good time to finally take the earring out of your ear, go to an English course, sign up for boxing, go to Bali – in short, do everything that the ex has been waiting for from you so much – then after parting. Upon learning about how much your life and yourself have changed, she, of course, will convince herself that this is all her sole merit. But enjoy your new image, embossed press, ocean view room, etc. it will not be her. And this, believe me, cannot but enrage.

Your success and salary growth

Each woman imagines herself a “guiding star”, “talisman”, “muse” and hopes that it is under her strict guidance and with her direct participation that a man will reveal his potential, start earning fabulous thousands, get a Grammy, etc. And yes, it’s a shame when, after years, he continues to vegetate unrecognized and underpaid. But it’s much, much more annoying when the former – “a loser and a simpleton, moreover hereditary” – suddenly gets a raise, an increase in salary and the status of “Discovery of the Year” almost immediately after parting. I bet you can even hear from the other end of the city with what rattle and crunch her internal feng shui will collapse, when it turns out that when she left your wretched life, you suddenly got rich and became famous.

Take your chance and good luck!