Flirting online: how far you can go and how dangerous it is(Part 2)
- Correspondence is continuous and regular.
We are well aware: no old acquaintance, even if she is at least three times the first love, can not keep the attention of a man for a long time. If we are talking about a playful conversation with some of your former classmate who started spontaneously, and that same evening, or after a couple of days, safely dried up (and you recklessly left him unused), there is no particular problem. Most likely, we will come to the conclusion that this was the same test of “flirting skills”. And a completely different alignment, if it is not a one-time conversation, but in everything – the general context, tone, topics discussed – it is clear that you meet online regularly. Every other day, and maybe every day. This is an occasion for a woman to interpret the situation as an “alarm bell”, to begin to monitor you more closely, etc., which in the end will not lead to anything good.
- You chat with a stranger in the evenings and at night
That is, when, in theory, a non-free man should be at home, with his family / lover. And, studying the history of your correspondence (or what you did not have time / forgot to wipe), do not even doubt – your girlfriend will pay attention to exactly what time you were talking. And you will be twice a bastard in her eyes if it turns out (and it, I remind you, it turns out) that the conversations took place at the moment when, for example, you could be with her, discuss how someone had a day, play with your child. You had a choice – to chat with your beloved in real life or with a stranger online. And you did it not in favor of your constant partner.
And it doesn’t matter who writes to whom first – you are her or her. We, women, understand perfectly well: sending you a message at inopportune times, that “other”, thereby often checks how strong your real union is. How easy it is to get into it. How easy it is to push your real girl friend / wife and take, if not a place, then at least the time that in theory belongs to her. And if you accept the game and answer it at night, subconsciously or quite meaningfully, you give it a “green light”. And this is a problem.
- You’re lying about who you talk to
A girl can and probably will ask what’s on your phone so important that you’re so stuck to it? And you have a choice: to say that this, for example, is based on work (that is, to lie), or try to react neutrally, for example, by issuing a partial truth (“Old acquaintance”, “Nothing important”, “Never mind”, etc. .d.). Lying is always an aggravating circumstance. And if (more precisely, when) they catch you on her, don’t even doubt it, it will be a million times harder for you to convince your friend that “it didn’t mean anything”. If you were hiding something, then there was something to hide. Presumption of innocence? No, they have not heard of such a thing.
- You talk to her about personal
Moreover, you’re not just revealing any intimate details (“Imagine, my daughter today first spiced up a melody from The Godfather! I laughed so!”), But complain. This is the most stalemate option. Firstly, because putting out dirty linen and huts, discussing your girlfriend over the eyes is simply unethical and, in fact, mean. Secondly, according to women’s understanding, in this way you make it clear to the “other” that your current union is imperfect, which means it is vulnerable. Thirdly, this means that you really have a relationship problem. Moreover, serious – since you are discussing the ups and downs of your real personal life with a virtual girlfriend, you complain about the feeling of disappointment, fatigue, accumulated stress, problems in bed, instead of sharing your pain with the girl friend / wife. It doesn’t matter where your body and genitals are physically located at this moment, but it’s obvious that you are there with your head and heart. But this, by female standards, is treason.
- You are interested in her personal life
Perhaps you ran into a damn curious interlocutor who, with the help of secret NLP techniques, lured all your spiritual secrets. Ok, maybe that. But if during the correspondence you yourself are actively interested in the details of the personal life of your virtual acquaintance, and she reports to you in detail about them, it’s completely rubbish. A funeral march will immediately sparkle in your girlfriend’s head in honor of your deceased relationship with her.
Firstly, it will mean that you are clearly joining the game. Secondly, since it’s not violet to you, what’s it like your new acquaintance, you’re ready to delve into and discuss her personal stories, which means that she is really interesting to you. Actually, for many women this is “moral treason.” You do not just have a virtual flirt, but a full relationship. And take my word for it: the exchange of intimate photos on the network hurts your girlfriend / wife less than a similar “sincere striptease”.
P.S. Get involved or not in such stories, you decide. The beauty and at the same time the danger of online flirting is that you, without noticing it, almost always stick to them. You are led to the fact that in the eyes of a virtual interlocutor it is very easy to look like anyone – it is enough to choose the right letters and arrange emoticons. Yes, this is virtual communication. But it generates quite real emotions for itself. And along with them – quite real consequences.
And the question is not whether you have / have / will have something similar, but how much you are aware of what is happening. And, in my opinion, the situation will not get out of control if you yourself, having caught yourself on such communication, ask yourself a question (earlier than your woman will do it): “What the hell am I doing?” And the next step is to try to put yourself in the place of the one behind whose back you play all this online romance.
Imagine how you open the phone of your girlfriend / wife – and you find something similar there … Sip your emotions, enjoy them. Painfully? Is it a shame? It is not clear what this all means and what to do next? Isn’t it better then to pick up words and skillfully merge a new network girlfriend in order to spend the time that you hung on the network to refine your own reality? As they say, nothing will change if nothing is changed.
