8 false attitudes that keep you in an unhappy relationship

All this is not a reason to endure indifference, conflicts and abuse.

  1. A person must have a pair

When we are alone, it seems to us that everyone is walking around in twos. That all families, children, weddings, joint trips and cute photos on Instagram. And in general, a person after a certain age is supposed to be in a relationship, this is as important an attribute as education and work, for example. And if you are alone, then something is definitely wrong with you.

In other words, people still make alliances simply because it is so customary, and remain in a relationship “for show.”

  1. Everyone will know that I am a failure

To break off a relationship means to show that you did not succeed here. Many perceive such a step as an admission of failure and even their own inferiority.

The modern world has taught us that we should always be joyful, successful and happy.

So, you need to smile, portray happiness in every possible way and post joyful photos in which you, holding hands, jump into the azure sea or feed each other with strawberries. Even if the soul is very hard.

  1. Everybody will feel sorry for me

After a break, tactless questions will inevitably fall on a person from all sides, some will begin to look at him with sympathy. At every family feast, they will sigh, ask why he is alone again and when to expect a wedding and grandchildren.

This is actually an ordeal. And many prefer to maintain a relationship that does not bring anything but disappointment, just not to tolerate all these pitiful looks and questions.

  1. Nothing terrible happens, everyone lives like this

It seems to many that very serious reasons are needed for a breakup: betrayal, domestic violence, alcoholism of one of the partners, poverty, some deep differences in mentality.

And if nothing terrible happens, there is no need to think about leaving your partner. Even if there is a quarrel at home after a day, there is no warmth in the relationship for a long time (or maybe there was not) and both feel unhappy.

This is how everyone lives: neighbors from above, and their own parents, and even star couples. Well, they swear, they hate each other – but it’s a matter of everyday life. You can be patient.

  1. There are no happy relationships at all.

That is, there are, but only on the pages of books or on the screens of cinemas. Behind any “happily ever after” is a harsh life, quarrels, misunderstandings, betrayal and other troubles. Those who say that everything is good and harmonious with them are simply lying.

This means that there is no point in breaking up an unsuccessful marriage: I will either end up in the same, or I will search all my life for a mythical happy relationship that does not actually exist.

  1. We’ve been together for so long

And it’s not even about jointly acquired apartments, cars and other material goods, but about the fact that people often feel sorry for common memories, impressions, happy moments, local stories and jokes. It seems that if you break off the relationship, all the good that was between them will automatically depreciate. And what if earlier it was good, but now it has become bad, then you need to endure for the sake of this common happy past.

But this is absolutely not the case. Bright moments will not disappear anywhere either from photo albums or from your memory. But dislike, scandals, abuse and betrayal can destroy any joyful memories.

  1. Getting used to a new person is difficult

“We have already got used to each other, we know each other well. If we disperse, I will have to look for someone else and get used to it again. And this is difficult. ” Indeed, the older we get, the more difficult it is for us to make new acquaintances, to get closer to an unfamiliar person, to let him into our life, to accept and love him with all his advantages and disadvantages.

Research shows that troubled relationships are associated with depression, anxiety, insomnia, and an even higher risk of heart disease. And this is much scarier than being alone for a while or getting used to a new partner.

  1. Breaking up is long and difficult

People are only held back by the difficulty of divorce. It seems that this is a monstrous bureaucratic procedure: you need to go through the authorities, collect papers, explain something to strangers and indifferent people. And even if the marriage was not concluded officially, it may not be so easy to break it either: it will be necessary, for example, to transport things, look for new housing, divide property, cats, and possibly children. No, it’s better to let everything remain as it is.

But if this is really the only reason, it’s easier to find an apartment, transport things and talk to officials than to make yourself and your partner unhappy for many years.

By Cindy
October 10, 2020

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