Conversations with anyone in general for many people are a nervous and incomprehensible thing. And when it comes to dialogues with someone you feel sympathy for, a fit of dumbness can simply happen here, even if you have long been an adult and self-sufficient. To make life easier for you, I will tell you point by point what and how to communicate with girls.

Prepare the soil

  1. Understand your own interests

You don’t need to be a genius to find something to talk about, but you definitely need to have interests and passions. A person who can naturally talk about things that interests him is always better at talking than someone armed with pre-written prompts and a vague hope of continuing the date.

So, first of all, take care of yourself.

Make a short list. List everything that interests you. More detail is better than less. For example, instead of “music” write “play classical guitar, go to concerts, collect old funky records.”

Memorize your opinion on each topic. This will help you get to know yourself better. When you talk about any subject that genuinely interests you, you will be able to confidently talk about it, causing the girl to respect.

  1. Talk to girls

Let’s say that the above was the theory, but now the practice. After you have put the contents of your head and life on the shelves, go to reality.

Wherever you regularly interact with women – at work, in a fitness club, in a coffee shop, or anywhere else – chat with them. This will teach you that there is nothing to be afraid of when talking to a girl, even if you are in love with her.

How to start chatting with a girl

Introduce yourself

All you have to do is say, “Hi, I’m Peter, what’s your name?” Or: “I’m Peter. Nice to meet you”.

You can also start by asking about something that you have in common: it’s easiest if you go to the same gym, drive the same brand car, sit in a vegetarian cafe, and so on.

When she answers and says her name, lightly shake her hand. Don’t be shy about it: this is a respectful gesture that shows that you are staying at a certain distance and not overstepping.

Once you know the girl’s name, use it a few times to make her think you are really interested in the conversation – it’s respectful to call the person by his name.

Topics for communication with girls

Try to steer the topic in the direction of what both of you care about, from your obsession with a community to your love of the bike.

You don’t have to do this by begging her for her five favorite groups, foods, hobbies, or exercises. You can just listen to the natural flow of her speech and see if you can find something that you both like.

Then organically integrate the found common theme into the conversation:

  • When you speak, be sure to ask open-ended questions instead of those that suggest answers “yes” or “no” so that you can go on and on with the conversation;
  • Be sure to avoid awkward silence! Remember: things will be awkward when you make them awkward, so be confident and keep talking;
  • Do not despair if you feel that you have nothing in common. After all, you can find something if you keep an interesting conversation for a long time;
  • If after a long conversation nothing was found, everything is fine. It is even easier to maintain a conversation when opposites are talking: each of you speaks out and listens to a different point of view.

Stay away from personal

If you like this girl, then of course your goal is to eventually get to know her from all angles, but that doesn’t mean you should talk about your grief over your grandmother’s death or describe a rash on your back in minute details seconds after the meeting.

Instead, choose light topics that are harmless and easy to talk about, such as your pets, favorite groups, or hobbies, so that you don’t feel uncomfortable in front of a girl before you actually get to know each other.

BUT easy topics to start a conversation don’t mean you should choose boring ones. You don’t need to talk about the weather, and God forbid, about politics.

If you see that the girl is disposed towards you and opens herself at will, then you can restrain yourself less. Moreover, you can directly ask the question that maybe she has topics that need to be circumvented.

Express interest in her thoughts and opinions

Listen carefully when she speaks. Girls like guys who listen to them and love what they talk about. Do not interrupt her so that she can express her opinion – this is the behavior of any educated person. Let her talk and share her thoughts with you.

Show that you are listening, however, by nodding, saying yes or no at the right time, and answering her questions.


As a person, and not as an object of attraction. You should compliment an aspect of her personality or her appearance without frightening her. If you like her music or the books she reads, tell her that she has great taste.

It’s okay if you say you like the way she dresses, the way she gestures, smiles, laughs, or just says that she is adorable.

Do not go beyond and in no case say anything about sexuality, about how hot she is or about her figure.

Melting her heart with humor

Girls like guys who make them laugh. Don’t be afraid to flaunt your wit and sense of humor – but no rudeness, vulgarity, or black humor.

You don’t have to start with a series of jokes to get her attention; just make harsh comments, insert quick jokes, and make unique observations about the world around you that make her think. If you have a silly, what you think, sense of humor, let her see it.

Smile, be relaxed!

Smile and don’t be afraid to look at her while she talks. Remember the old adage: “Laugh and the world will laugh with you.” We make our best impression when others are happy.

Leave serious and sad topics of conversation.

Take the initiative

If the conversation is calm, but otherwise everything is going well, tell her about a recent event in your life that relates to one of your personal interests. Don’t be silent, keep the conversation going!

Ask for her contacts

If you really have already made friends with the girl, then you can ask for her social media accounts or, better, for a phone number.

Just say something like, “I have to go, but I would like to continue our communication. You do not mind?”. Can I call you so we can talk more? ” She will say yes without hesitation!

By Cindy
July 23, 2020

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