WHAT IS BETTER TO ASK ON THE FIRST DATE? GUIDE OF 9 QUESTIONS
If you follow this instruction, everything will be like clockwork.
First meetings and dates are not only beautiful, but also cosmicly awkward. This is a very nervous event: you need to be charming, witty, polite and attractive, plus try not to cross the line, but not be too distant, and to overcome many other obstacles.
In addition to all of the above, you also have a strategic task: to find out if this is your person (at least superficially and approximately), and whether you will have at least one more meeting with this girl (and in the future, relations).
Here are nine of the best questions with which you will get all the information you need, but don’t turn into an investigator.
- What is your dream job?
Most of the dates and most of the first meetings begin with the question, as they say, in the forehead: “So what do you do / where and who do you work?”. This is an ordinary, but boring and almost formal way to start a conversation.
If you instead ask what kind of work she would most like to do or what kind of work she dreams of, you will get an idea of her ambitions, values and priorities, and plus you will immediately become more interesting and attractive in her eyes than 99% of others men.
Naturally, answering such a question, she will tell what she is doing now. But along with this you will get a full conversation, and not a dry answer to the asked question and an awkward pause after it.
- What have you read lately that impressed you?
This is a question that will reveal even more the interests of your lady and give her the opportunity to discuss them, which she is likely to like. Note: the question is very broad, do not think to ask, “Which book have you liked the most recently?” – so you can put her in an awkward position, because she may not have a passion for books, but at the same time be read out by serious magazines and analytical articles.
This question is good because it covers books, magazines, blog posts, and articles on online sites that she read in any case.
- What are you looking for in a dating world?
At the very beginning, it is simply necessary to clarify whether you and her have the same expectations, to say directly about your intentions. Is she looking for a husband, just a long-term relationship or just a fleeting connection? And you?
If this point is not clarified, then disappointment and resentment on both sides will follow. Do not allow this.
- Do you have brothers and sisters?
This is a fairly general, but very tricky question. The family background of a person can give a little more idea about what kind of person it is, about your compatibility. Such a question then will expand the conversation far beyond the simple enumeration of brothers and sisters to a sweet discussion about where she came from, what her childhood was, and so on.
Do not give in to the desire to play a psychologist, you risk committing terrible stupidity – if her parents divorced, this does not mean that she is “injured” or doomed to be in the same situation, for example.
Strive to create conditions in which she herself, with pleasure and freedom, will talk about her family, without expecting any analysis from you.
- How long have you been without a couple?
Previous relationships can be a dangerous area for discussion on a first date, but getting an idea of the relationship history of your friend will be very useful.
But be careful, because in this case it is very easy to cross the line and create the impression of a person who does not see any boundaries in the conversation. Remember that while you are just her casual acquaintance.
- If you could have dinner with any three people, who would you choose?
Of course, this will not bring you 10 points for originality. But such abstract questions about fictitious situations are a very good way to get to know a person.
This question allows you to very well reveal her relationship with people: who interests her and why, what personalities she admires, and much more.
- The best place you’ve ever been to?
Most people light up when given the opportunity to discuss their favorite vacation or trip. The theme is light and evokes pleasant memories, so this is the perfect choice for a first date.
Suddenly you find out that she is literally a researcher and traveled to some Southeast Asia for six months? Or maybe she studied abroad? Let him tell!
- What are your plans for the weekend?
Talking on a first date does not have to cover large topics that are meaningful for life, and this question is useful for determining how a girl entertains herself in her free time, which she prefers to spend her free hours on.
It will also talk about her habits, values and preferences.
- Do you want to meet again next week?
Let’s face it: the purpose of dating is to find the one you want to see again and again. If a girl suits you, and all her answers indicate compatibility and mutual interest, why not immediately agree on a second date?