6 signs of a big baby
- When do you like to play “the sickest person in the world”
I could write a whole treatise about the tendency of men to perceive any ailment as if it were fatal. About the habit of laying on a sofa and demanding a cold compress on his head at a temperature of 37.1. About the need to call in a hoarse voice an ambulance, resuscitator, mother, spiritual mentor and notary, when the temperature rises to 37.2. About the look in which all the grief of the Jewish people is concentrated, and tragically pursed lips. But I won’t (for now). Just say: know the measure. Unlimited female patience ends somewhere after two days of service by the patient’s bed in the absence of real risks of remaining a widow.
- When you talk about yourself in “sweet” intonation
A girl can have fun with you and give you various idiotic nicknames. But God forbid you express yourself in a similar manner! A rare female libido is able to endure the phrase “The baby has pain”, said by a sexually mature man with a 43-foot size and a full beard. So rare that it does not seem to exist.
- When you offer help and then merge
Testosterone phrases of the format “Do not worry, I will decide everything”, “Let me better”, etc. produce on women, without exaggeration, a stunning impression. It is so overwhelming that for quite a long time we refuse to believe in the obvious fact: you blurted it out not at all because you want and can help, but simply because you had the good time to paint yourself.
- When do you have a “scam” whim
A man can and should have a hobby. But, honestly, I’ll say: I would not want it to lie in the spectrum of interests of a 7-year-old child. Typically, girls are able to marry, looking at how you teach a neighbor boy how to handle a gameboy, ride a skateboard and watch a couple of cartoons with him. But when you do the same thing all alone, and to the detriment of “adult” business and plans, it’s so … sad.
- When you abuse the word “by chance”
How could you get drunk on the eve of an important interview ?! Manage to forget in a taxi the third umbrella in a week? !! Promise to buy bread and a dozen eggs in the store, and return with laundry soap and paper clips? !!! To be without pants in the apartment of a recently divorced neighbor? !!!! To all one answer – by chance. Such an objective (passive) position tells a woman about one thing: a comrade is not ready to take responsibility even for himself, not to mention another person like her.
- When at a critical moment you “turn on” the child
Believe me, nobody likes to quarrel and listen to reproaches. It’s hard for everyone to bear the sight of other people’s tears. Everyone wants this “heavy” (clarification of relations, decision-making process, analysis of mistakes made, etc.) to end soon and it would be fun to jump and jump again. And in principle, there is a way to stop all this “crap”: at the slightest pressure from the partner’s side, immediately start screaming, waving hands, slamming doors and tearing into the night so that the person who started it all (usually a woman) will bitterly regret the hassle . I call this “turning on the child” —that is, issuing a deliberately hypertrophied reaction to frighten and discourage an objectionable interlocutor. About the same goal is pursued by children when they lie on the floor in a store and begin to tan on the tile with their hands and feet, screaming and snot. But if in the case of a child a woman usually does not have the opportunity to say: “Oh, I do not like this boy. I’ll go and find myself another, more adequate ”, then in the case of a boyfriend / lover / husband, this over time begins to seem not such a crazy idea.
