Going to the left … The most popular myths and facts about adultery(Part 2)

Thesis 4: Lying is the worst

This is the favorite phrase of all the heroines of the television series. When they say it, they usually have beautiful lips that tremble beautifully, which for this reason the makeup artist smears gloss with the marking “tragic, emotional”. Well, the hero usually immediately gives up the slack, unleashes a language and generally behaves like an idiot. “Yes, like an idiot,” agrees a well-known specialist in family and marriage.

First, we should not forget that in fact very often the one who has been changed does not want to know the truth. Even if he demands, threatens and blackmails, insisting that he be told everything, in his heart he only wants to hear something like: “Yes, there was nothing! How could you even think such a thing, my wife and mother of my children ?! ”

Secondly, a lie in such a situation is the desire to preserve and preserve relationships. ” In other words, even if everything is revealed, you can only blame you for the strongest feelings for your partner, which forced you to lie. That is, your lie in such a situation only flatters the woman. Therefore, God forbid you the devil the next morning after a random betrayal rush to his girlfriend and spread to her the whole truth! Sincerity will not glue the crystal vessel of your senses that you have just cracked with a hammer. Disproved!

Thesis 5: Control is more reliable than trust

Spontaneous betrayals often occur only because the one changing is sure: no one will know about anything. Therefore, the one who always controls the mobile and the mail of his girlfriend and looks after what she actually does when she goes shopping for days – such a prudent person is insured against betrayals much safer than the gullible. The point here is not even that the ancient truth “the forbidden fruit is sweet” (although it is very sweet) works.

Much more dangerous is this: the victim of such control is gradually freed from remorse of conscience. Indeed, it is one thing to deceive the one who believes in you, and quite another to the jailer. In the second case, the feeling of guilt is reduced to a minimum, and in fact it is the main deterrent that hinders changing with everyone in a row. Disproved!

Thesis 6: Women cheat less often

Well, yes, after all we are more decent people. Well, that is, in matters of family and marriage. In the end, it’s all the time we chat about loyalty, about ideals and about the fact that I want to get married and have a child.

Especially for naive citizens, the Institute for the Study of Public Opinion (GEWIS) recently published data obtained from a pan-European survey. Now you will laugh. So, women cheat on their regular partners as a whole by 4-6% more often than you. (In Germany, this gap is generally 8%). So Othello was right about something.

Although institute specialists are inclined to associate this with the fact that it is easier for women than men to quickly find casual sexual partners in those moments when they are seriously offended by their regulars (and almost a third of all betrayals happens in these cases). Disproved!

Thesis 7: Cheat once will cheat further

Here the main thing to begin, and then on the machine will go: the barrier is already destroyed, there is nothing to lose. In general, the GEWIS research is consistent with this thesis: out of 100 people who have changed their half at least once, 94 have done this more than once, and 84 with different partners. But here’s an interesting point: when you change your regular partner, the standard of behavior changes. Anyone who has never betrayed his previous one, may well go to the winds. And on the contrary, the malicious traitor at the first constant girl has a good chance to turn into an exemplary family man at the second. Confirmed! It seems to be ..